ASR: B3: Chapter 1: In a world where expression is a freedom we abuse
Chapter 1: In a world where expression is a freedom we abuse
In a world where we rely on people’s expression to get to know who they are and allows others, to know who we are. In a world where expression is a freedom we abuse — without regard for consequences. Of course, there will be lots of miscommunications and tragedies. They are unavoidable because we are often too occupied by ourselves to notice the damage we do to others.
In a world where standards are set with the assumption that we are all not evenly equal; but taught should be the same. It is no surprise that any differences are regarded with caution and aversion. Just because someone is not good at something as common as communicating the way WE know everyone else could. We jump to the conclusion that there is something wrong with them — and diagnosis them for our understanding conveniences.
When in actuality; they are simply different from us. And the problem lies with the fact that we cannot adapt and accept that differences — Not with the person themselves. But we project our problem as theirs to make us feel better about ourselves. Or to have an answer to satisfy our needs for confirmation and control of what we do not know — and yet to understand.
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Standing out, is not as it is overplayed/marketed to be in Hollywood films or stories.
The wisdoms and ordeal of my earlier years and the lessons I have learned through my experiences made me beyond many people’s comprehension. So, people take it on themselves to diagnose me as: “messed up, “dysfunctional”, “delusional,” “weird,” “crazy”, “strange,” “paranoid”, “psycho”, “perfectionist”, “too cold”, “judgmental”, “too soft”, “naïve”, “young”, “gullible”, “innocent” and whatever else to suit their perception of what they can understand.
I have been told many times throughout my life by others, that maybe I have lost sight on the perception of life’s real meaning and value. Conditioned by the people in my environment, I used to believe those accusations. But instead of suffering low self-esteem because everyone keeps telling me that there is something “wrong” with me. That I am the problem — that I am the one that should change or should be a certain way.
I lived in pure agonizing and frustrating disorientation that grounds me to many natural truths that others — have yet to learn. Thus, before I realize who I was meant to be, I was frustrated by my lack of comprehension as to why I cannot “be like everyone else”. Why I cannot be “normal”. Why I cannot see the world the way others see it. Why do I keep seeing things that are beyond my fellow peers to see. Know things that are beyond others much, much older, and taught to be perceived as assumingly wiser than I should know. I was born here and raise here, but I cannot see the world the way everyone else around me see it.
I have been through enough pain and suffering, I should “smarten up” and learn the lessons I was taught. The lessons being: I must play games; must play others to my will; I must cheat; I must lie; I must manipulate; I must hold grudges; I must retaliate at those who made me suffer; I must bully; I must be heartless; I must not care; I must be strong; I must show confident even when I have not yet earned the right to be; I must look out for the number one — me before others. I also must be overambitious and reach far. Be my own “God” of life and take control of it and move it in whichever direction I want. I must not care who I stomp upon as I make a path for myself because if I do not step on others; they will step on me. In the physical world, this is what I was told, shown, and obviously taught.
It is a constant struggle for me to try to understand these lessons. Trying to see how this make so much sense to others when it does not make any sense to me — at all. My connection to the other world taught me that there are other options. Instead of stomping on others or make them suffer at my expenses, I was taught that I can ask them to walk besides me as a companion upon this journey. I was also taught that true strength is not in bullying others just because I am given the power to do so. But in being able to resist the temptation to do so; with the power I am given. After all, giving into temptation is easier than resisting it. Taught too, that being a decent person is something you have to work hard at every day — Not just someday.
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I was taught that a diamond is just a rock unless you give it value. And even if you give it the value you decide it deserve, if someone else do not agrees — it has no value. The truth is: it does not matter how we choose to see it. The reality is: it is a rock dig up from the earth just like any other rock. It has its place, its purpose, and its own use. Just like people, no one is more important than anyone else. We all have a role and a place; we all can contribute to the greater design. We all have something to give, the question is: how willing are we to share it?
I was taught to see life by the higher power objectively as a whole, not subjectively as an individual. Because I was taught to value and respect every contribution and effort individually as a whole. In a world where the ideology of “Self” and “mine” comes before “we” or “us”; can you see my conflicts growing up? Not knowing the origin of where my principles and values come from, I was unable to realize, understand or justify how I can comprehend and accept things as they are — while others, as of yet — cannot. I am not totally blinded-sided or naïve to human nature. I just choose to see it in all its facets and accept it for what it is: While hoping for the best and have faith in the possibilities. Instead of setting myself up to the scale limit standardized by the expectations of what I was taught to see.
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Before today, I was lost within myself and how I was taught the world should be. Because everyone I know, nine out of ten people think like everyone else, and I am the only one who thinks like me. I was led to believe that I am the one with the “glitches”. That this world does not have a place for me, because my differences weight against and anchor the achievements of those others that want to move forward in unity.
In a world where you are expected to behave the same but is taught superficially — not equally the same. When you are confined and restricted to think you should be like everyone else, your differences make you a natural target for fear, suspicion, prejudice, and discrimination. That diamond is nothing but a rock until someone with influences and privileges (not just material privileges) comes along to say it is otherwise and place a value upon it. Those who does not want to be left out of this latest “cool” trend will agree. But it does not mean it is really anything more than it is just because some of us choose to believe so.
In a world based on believes, everyone’s beliefs are the “right” one. But the strong (majority) will prevail as “true/right” and the “weak/wrong” (minority) as fictional, imagination, and fantasy. That is the differences between this world and the world beyond. In the world beyond the physical, truth exist as is, not as it could be — or how you want it to be. Thus, just because we arrogantly believe in something and want to make it “real” does not mean it is. No matter how many people we have to back us up or reassure us that it is so. The natural truth of the universe exists un-testified by the number of majorities. It does not need reinforcement or assurance by those who are blinds to it. It exists whether you believe it or not, experience it or not, can see it or not, want to or not.
