ASR: B14: Chapter 9: To Redefined The Old Ways, We Must Re-Walk It — With New Wisdoms And Insights.
Why is it so HARD for me to accept, believe, and embrace something I ALREADY know? It should be EASY. I have MORE than enough experiences to do so. So WHY?
What is my aversion to it? I have wondered if it is because I have grown attached to life, so I did not want to embrace my spirituality. Those are my believe for a time, and it is still true. But recently, I realize it is because my higher instincts kicked in. Kicked in to keep me from falling into the trap of my own making. It feared the damage it will do to my higher self and my higher mission if my avatar embrace…falsely. By that I mean if I had embraced it easily and early on. I would be lost in my anxiousness to learn. To have an answer for what is “wrong” with me. Therefore, I would absorb all information I am fed biasedly. Desperately. Thus, be completely lost and derailed by my desire to have an explanation, to “fit-in”, or be “normal.”
Though, I did not understand it then. My higher instincts understand and recognize, all the abuse that comes with having “spirituality” becoming a new fad by social media. Most of the Youtubers, bloggers, and other influencers who are in it for the rating and for the money. All those gurus and “know it all” influencers, that flood the social media platform to use it to generate income to live of off. Has made “spirituality” nothing more than a fashion trend now a day.
Therefore, at the beginning of my acceptance stage: The outrageously hipped enthusiasm of both the “teacher” and their audiences and followers…repulsed me. Being someone who has insights into people; who understand marketing; who know how manipulation works. I cringe with aversions and pain at how good those opportunists are. It physically pains me. Like a gut punch right to my soul, on what they were teaching about “spirituality”. On some of what were taught, impressed, and promoted for people to do with their higher abilities.
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Do not get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with sharing your knowledge and experiences with “spirituality”. There is nothing wrong with being aware of what possibilities lies out there for us to explore. Nothing wrong with having knowledge available to us so we can educate ourselves. So, we can know and have it available to us for when we need it. It is great, that so many people want to share their different experiences. Want to help other awaken with more ease.
Great, that we try to connect and learn from each other. Learn better ways to approach and deal with some of the obstacles that comes with the spiritual journey. Great that we want to be there for each other and can do so through social media. What is not great — is being ungrounded. Letting yourself become overwhelmed by other people’s experiences. By their influential perspectives, believes, thoughts, and enthusiasm. Letting your own customized spiritual path become slowly corrupted by expectations. Then, being derailed from the amazing starting point and getting so lost; you do not even realize how lost you have become.
Knowledge is power — right? Nothing wrong with embracing power and making it work with you. But there is a problem when we become ungrounded by all the “powers,” we think we have. Then, to lose control and allow ourselves to be manipulated and corrupted by it. Or by the people who play upon our curiosity and desires. To draw us into listening to them, and mindlessly do as they do.
Remember, our life is a customized suit designed just for us. Therefore, so are our spiritual journey. So, are our lessons and our level of understanding at each ascensions level. Because of this knowledge, I was truly repulsed by all the videos and articles that teaches. That encourages and gives the impressions…That anyone and everyone — can use and access their gifts however they want. Anyone can step right into any level of spiritual understandings they want, just because they think they can.
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One example that floods the social media platforms, that stands out the most to me: is the overwhelming number of articles and videos about the “law of attraction.” As human beings, greed is a natural trait. So, it is not a surprise that this subject is the most popular and most embraced. Again, there is nothing wrong with sharing some information about the subject.
But there is something wrong with teaching someone how to manipulate and force their will upon someone else. There is a LOT of videos and books that teaches someone to manifest everything from love to easy money to miracles. For examples: being taught to manifest a phone call or a text from an ex. Or how to get them back. How to get someone to chase you; how to get a specific person or manifest a miracle at will.
Yes, we can do all that…but should we? Is it ethical and moral to manipulate and bend someone’s higher will to our ways? Especially, when they are unaware and unequipped to deal with such form of manipulation. It is one thing to manipulate and bend someone’s physical will to our way. Because it is physical, because humanity have a rich history of experiences, where people have done it to each other. Thus, many are generally educated of its possibilities. Hence, knows ways to guard or take caution against it to protect themselves.
But it is altogether, another level of maliciousness. When we try to enslave someone’s higher and eternal body to our will…to satisfy our own desperate desires. It is an abhorrent habit to get into. Do we really need to wait a thousand year to realize we are making the same mistake on a different path?
It is immoral enough in this physical world when someone tries to manipulate another to their will. To do so using higher abilities, when the individual is not aware, and it is against their higher will. Using your higher body to mandate the action is a crime. One that we cannot leave behind in this physical realm when our time here is done. Because it is a crime committed using higher resources, it will be judged by the standards of the higher court.
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Therefore, a “true spiritualist” would never teach that it is “O.K.” To promote that it is “alright” — Especially to anyone and everyone who wants to learn. Because it is not “O.K.” nor “alright”. It is a high form of abuse, neglect, and irresponsibility to teach anyone who is not aware of their responsibilities and obligation to such privileges. Because we are all customized to our lessons. To the level of understanding that we are at. Thus, to teach someone who is not yet ready for those lessons, can result in detrimental rippling effects.
At this point, I am sure there will be lots of argument by the enthusiastic and fanatics who think I am being too pessimistic or too “negative” about the possibilities. But am I? Or are they too sweep away by enthusiasm to care about consequences? That is what we human have been doing time after time throughout our history. Mindlessly and enthusiastically diving head-first into our optimism regardless of consequences. Then over glorifying our mistakes to undermine our actions…and its detrimental consequences.
Just remember in a realm where its people are prone by nature to be selfish, to be careless, thoughtless, and mindless. People who have a history of letting their greed, optimism, and enthusiasm dictate their actions regardless of consequences. People who are prone to be tempted and have easily given into accept, embrace, and indulging in corruptions and destruction. Thus, if we are not mindful, the damages we can do is unlimited.
Yes, we can do a lot of good, teaching 10 people to realize their abilities. But in the 10 people — if only one is not ready and choose to be corrupted. That one can do a lot more harm, than the other 9 people can be prepared for. Because corruptions are desired. Is a natural craving in this realm. Hence, easier to accept and embrace. Create one and set it free and it will catch on like a virus. Going unnoticed until it is almost too late to catch the damage it has done.
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In life certain things are meant to happen — naturally…others are meant to not happen. We do sometimes have some control of different aspects we are face with. It is also, one thing to bend — to intentionally misinterpret, and find loopholes…In the physical law books of this realm to manipulate and work it in our favor. It is another, to do the same to the cosmic laws — A realm we know very little or nothing about.
I caution those who are eager to do damage to others. To teach what they do not yet fully understand. It is very hard to resist the attention, hard to resist the money, and the success that comes with being a “star”. Almost impossible to resist the “ego” of that success. Yes, your millions of followers will give you the income you receive from that book you sold. That YouTube channel they subscribe too, or that seminar you gave. They are just a number goal you want to reach. They are unimportant, insignificant, and not worthy to identify individually — As long as you credit yourself for your success.
A success that ends with this life. Unless you found a formula for immortality, that success will turn to smoke once you are gone from this realm. The price in exchange, however, remain into the eternal realm. Of that success is every individual one of those millions that you condemned to never be able to ascend. Because you taught them what they are not ready for…Because you “rushed” through your lessons. Hence, every one of the misguided is a mark upon you. So, please be mindful and conscious of the causes and effect of your actions. Not just to yourself, but to others as well.
We do not need higher spiritual gifts to see what human nature is. Nor do we need it to know what happens when we mistakenly give a child the remote control to a bomb. Given to an adult who understand what a bomb is. An adult who is also aware and understands its impact on them and everyone else, if that button is to be pressed…Is different from giving it to a child who see a button and wants to press it. Press it out of curiosity to see what it would do. Or just press it because it moves.
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For those who waves me off because you think I might be overthinking too much. Again, I ask, what do you think the purpose for this material world is? Why do we exist? Why do we live? Why do we die? Why do you think all those ascended masters like that of Jesus and Buddha and the many — not ascended yet, teachers are not going around flaunting their abilities in our face? Why did Jesus not stop what happened to him?
Why are there not more highly spiritual people in positions of “power”? We could really use a few more millionaires and billionaires who are highly spiritual — right? So, why are they not using their power of manifestations to be in those “powerful” positions? Imagine what they can do, how much changes can be done…maybe just overnight by them. Such powerful people, yet why are they not using their power to do so?
I used to wonder those questions a lot, used to get so frustrated with the “blocks” and the “unfair” restrictions placed upon me. But now, I am so grateful that I was not allowed to do what I wanted to do. So grateful for every “harsh” disciplinary lesson to help me become more mindful and aware of the consequences of being young, ignorant, and full of optimism and enthusiasm.
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Think on it — If we are meant to manifest anything and everything we want and need, why would we need to be here? What would we learn? What can we learn, when all we need to do is think it and we shall have it?
I can testify that manifestation is an actual ability that does exist. It is real. But the confirmation of its existence does not mean we can abuse it. Maybe I think too much. But maybe that is precisely the reason why I am given the higher purpose to write this book. Because I am doing what I am supposed to do: Which is to think, to be self-aware, to be mindful, to be conscious of my actions, and see what others often overlook and played down on. I am the results of my lessons. My whole life and all the brutal lessons are the path to this record. So, it must mean something — right?
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I mean my whole life even though I am taught by all in my life that those abilities can not exist. Yet, I can freely do them since I was a child before I was even aware, they are a possibility. Because I can do them before I was even taught that I am not able to. Because I have no idea what I was doing. I ended up stumbling upon true higher rules by breaking them. Because of the severity of my “punishment/discipline” as consequences. Thus, I learned to think from all angles before I act. Due to my inquisitive mind and taught skepticism because of the “gifts” — You can be sure not only have I tried to think from all angles. But I have also tested my boundaries — from all angles too…just to make sure I have got my facts straight.
Living the surrealism of my life and taught to be the person that I am — you can be sure I am someone not afraid to be repetitively burnt to get to the truth of what matters to me. Since, for most of my life, I wanted to be “normal.” Therefore, I have put up epics fight against the source…and lost — repeatedly. You can rest assure that I would not settle for anything but the absolute higher truth.
Remember, as someone forced to live a life where I had nothing to lose and nothing I want to gain. Therefore, this is how I see it: If I am born destined to walk the spiritual path. A path that was against my physical will. If it is my destiny — meaning I do not have a choice in the matter. Then it damn well, should be able to stand up to the challenges of my will. To prove that it is my destiny and higher mandate; not for some superficial desire to do so because of old-templated teachings that I am taught.
Having gone through many cycles of having been burn to ashes — only to start again, so that I can remember my higher lessons. So that those higher teachings could be engraved into my soul. All the while, being BLOCKED from all “spiritual coach/mentor” from this physical realm — on purpose. Because the higher power reserves the right to teach me itself. It must mean something. That here I am, finally on a path I have fought almost my entire life to not be on.
I could be wrong. But being someone destined to live a lifetime full of miracles and extraordinary events for this record to be possible. Though, I am still reversing the draft of this book after starting it almost 10 years ago. The fact that the higher power and my guides are still being very cautious. Still, very selective of giving me only the very bare minimal from “spiritual” coaches of this realm…Must means something — right?
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The only time, that I get any form of information or interaction with anyone of this realm that can give me information — is when there is already a given answer. But I am too stubborn to accept and needed more “concrete” proof before I will budge on the topics. That is when synchronicity would show up to re-confirm “the voice” or what I was already shown. However, if I remain to be determined to stay ignorant of what I refuse to learn. My life would fall apart in the most bazaar of ways, to force me to acknowledge and accept the lesson as it is.
However, when I am too eager to learn from the mundane resources I was given, I would be “cut” off. I would literally get sick to my stomach, and like a gut punch to my soul. The information would feel so wrong I could not bare the averse physical reaction. I tried; it only hurts more. Almost like the time I mentioned where I saw and felt a lightening bolt stab at me. Then, was “locked” within my body because I went too far. Like I have said. My battle was epic. Being awakened to my “spirituality” before I even realize what life is all about. I have learned since I was a child to test my limitations.
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Even before time stopped to “formally” awakened me at around two years old, I was already aware of the higher energy of the source. I think I have always been “awake” to the other realm. Therefore, something a little more “special” needed to happen, for me to remember that I am not of this world. Without extra-extraordinary things happening to me, it would be hard for me to “graph” and “timeline” events. This is due to all the extraordinaire I experiences in my daily life. Therefore, time stopping/pausing was the only thing that was impossible enough to make an everlasting impression. That I cannot forget, write off, or ignore. It was the only thing big enough to ground me at such an age, to the differences between the worlds I belong too.
Being so young, I was allowed to take “naps” as I physically grew, to give me time to adjust, digest, and rest — but only to be “awaken” again and again and again. Many who go through “spiritual awakening” will tell you that for most of the time, it is not an easy process. Many cannot handle it and has been overwhelmed and gone “crazy” because of all the energy overloads.
Thus, can you imagine what it is like for a lost “spiritual” child. Blocked from all “spiritual” topic, going through this process constantly throughout her life? Blocked from anyone she could learn from about “spirituality.” But the spirits themselves — Whom she is mis-taught to fear and resent. Not only is misinformation forced upon her due to her environment in one realm. In another she is taught the total opposite at the same time. Because she is a being that belong to both worlds and does not know it.
Can you imagine the chaos and struggle this child must go through, both internally and externally, to be who she is? It is one thing to develop or come into a new sensory. Another, to suddenly loose so many of your sensory all at once. It is not easy being blind, but it is easier (by a little) to be blind since birth. Then it is to suddenly lose your abilities to experiences the world the way you are used to experiencing it.
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To make sure that I know my higher abilities and experiences are real. I was forced to take “naps” and forced to “awaken” again and again — to both worlds. So, that I know their differences to tell them apart. Therefore, it is not a surprise that I learned to become a skeptic. All the constant stopping to do “reality check,” was essential to my journey. So many times, in my life I wondered if I was “crazy” and if I would know it if I am.
I wondered, so I need to constantly tests and questions myself to prove and make sure I am not. Hence, the reason why I put “spirituality” under a “microscope.” Then, try to investigate it clinically. Why I try to see everything from many perspectives, and the reason why I must also overthink! Because only by learning to be thorough, can I maximize the use of deductive reasonings. To use it to make sure my theories and answers have ground to hold me through the chaos of every “re-awakening”.
Because I was block and ignorant to what I was “awakening” up to. Because of all the “lives” I have “lived” — there was also a lot I needed to “purge” and remember — to make wiser choices in this “life”. I was blocked from my “spiritual” physical education of it — to re-learn it. Re-walk it. In order to re-define it against the old templates that overwhelm me in this “life.” I am taught directly only through experiences. “Spirituality” is more personal and customized when taught this way. In this way I intimately understand that “spirituality” is not just a term. Also, that all the components that makes it what it is — goes much deeper than all those superficial surface “frills” (like tools, routines, ceremonies, and rituals) that are popularized.
Therefore, it must mean something, that my life is tailored to result in this book of records. As I have said, I fought my destiny tooth and nail. (I STILL am.) I am not a religious and spiritual enthusiast. In fact, in my recent “re-awakening” I became a “hater” for a period, of both religious and spiritual practice.
I felt deep resentment to both topics due to how powerful the influences of the higher realm have on me throughout my life. Until I “purged” all that was done to me in the other timelines, and in this presence “life” in the name of those two terms. At the beginning of my recent awakening, I became averse to both practices. The fact that I know I am destined to educate others to it — makes me resented it even more due to the result of my roles and my “other” experiences and encounter with it.
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In my other “lives/timelines” and my current life. I live in excruciating pain as the result of the ignorant of people who choose to embrace what they do not fully know. Who choose to blindly act on that ignorant to commit horrific crimes. Crimes, they then pardon themselves with by simply rewriting it in less incriminating terms.
Coming from a world of complete love, I was ignorant and innocent to the limitations and challenges of those who does not understand what “love” is. Before I realized I must learn to limit myself from that complete form of love to function in this world — A world that does not understand higher love. To ground to the level of this world so I can understand its position. My soul was massacred again and again through the trials.
Being taught how powerful I can be, only to be put continuously in positions of complete helplessness by a force I cannot fight — are lessons I needed to learn. Not what I wanted to learn. But I must learn it to be who I am here to be. However, currently I am only human. There is only so much continuous beating my avatar can take without given proper time to heal. I completely understand why I needed to learn all I must learn; it is for myself as much as it is for my role.
But being exhausted now, and warily from all my battles. Because of that my physical self — just want to live a carefree, duty free, and responsibility free life. A life where I do not need to be involve in other people’s lives. So, I do not have to face the painful result of loving people who are so unaware, so selfish, so mindless, and so ignorant again. Nor face with the consequences of the backlash of trying to educate and help such people, to learn what they do not choose to learn.
Therefore, it is ironic that it is my higher mission to be the one to ground people. To be the one to go against the popular believes. To inform, to clarify, and bring awareness to the “other” side of whatever they choose to embrace and attached to. I have tried to fight this mission. This higher purpose because I have seen my other “lives” and only just recently have I been shown what happens “after.” If I do not thread carefully, as the results of going against what people want to believe in. More than anyone, I want to believe that I can “walk away” so I can have “peace” and a more comfortable life for myself. But by now I know I am not stronger than my destiny. Sometimes what you want, is insignificant to what is needed to be done.
https://aspiritualistsrecord.medium.com/asr-b14-chapter-4-the-voice-of-love-bdcabd4b37fa
